The Christmas Gathering
by GundamWingFanatic90
Summary: Chapter 2 is finally up! Hilarity! This is my first real attempt at a humor fic, please don't sue! Flame if you want. Enjoy! Rated for language.
1. Ding Dong!

Hey! My best friend and I thought of this thing one day when we were driving home from Elephant Rock State Park in Missouri. It was thought of on a whim, and I promised I'd write it as a Christmas present for Jedi Bubbles. So here it is! Merry Christmas, _mellon-nin_!!

Disclaimer: This is the only disclaimer I will do for this whole fic. I do not own any characters in this fic except for Abriel, and my best friend, Jedi Bubbles, owns Zenshin, Toan, Keynu, Shino, Neo, Amina, and The Chaos Brothers.

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_**The Christmas Gathering**_

Chapter 1: The Gundam Boys Play Ding-Dong Ditch

Heero rolled his eyes, wondering what the hell possessed him to go along with Duo's insane pranking plots. The pilot in question was fidgeting impatiently as they waited for the other three pilots to arrive. Finally, the doorbell rang. Duo jumped up and rushed to the front door, a flying ball of braided energy, and pulled the door open to find Chang Wufei, Quatre Raberba Winner, and Trowa Barton standing on the stoop. Heero rolled his eyes at Duo's antics as Relena sat down on the sofa next to him.

"Duo's quite energetic when he's excited, isn't he?" she asked quietly as Heero comfortably placed an arm around his lover's slim waist. She placed her hands gently in her lap, holding the glass of water she had gotten up to get as the three newcomers sat down nearby.

"Spill it, Duo." came Wufei's annoyed voice. "Why the hell did you call us out here on the only day a week we get off from Preventer work?" Duo, who had been thoughtfully facing the wall, now turned towards them with a characteristic smirk on his face.

"Three words. Ding. Dong. Ditch." came the reply, and Heero inwardly groaned, dropping his face into his hand.

_Maxwell, I am going to murder you one of these days…_ he thought, though he didn't say it out loud. Duo was receiving blank looks from the rest of the Gundam pilots as he grinned like an idiot in front of them.

"You want us to play… Ding-Dong Ditch…?" came Quatre's voice after a moment. Duo nodded vigorously, the expression on his face turning evil. One could practically see the horns holding up the halo, and the tail and pitchfork were pretty darn hard to miss, too.

"Yep. And since you guys owe me for that time last week when you all were too damn tired to do any work, I thought that this could be your payback to me." he said smugly. Heero and Relena exchanged glances with the other Gundam pilots. Last week there had been a holiday party at Preventer HQ, and all the Gundam pilots had been there with their dates. What happened, though, was that they all ended up staying awake way too late that night due to all of the caffeine in their systems, and in Heero and Relena's case, a little too much alcohol. The two of them had woken up the next morning to find themselves passed out (for the first time), sprawled on the sofa at Heero's apartment. Duo had had way too much caffeine, and had driven everyone to their wits end. This caused several of the attending employees to go home early, even though it was pouring rain outside, explaining how Heero and Relena ended up where they were. The next day, none of them (except Duo, who didn't remember a thing) were awake enough to do any work, and Duo did it for them. This is why the other four Gundam pilots and Relena were in debt to the overly hyper Deathscythe pilot.

Grumbling, Heero and the rest of them acknowledged defeat, and Duo grinned even more evilly than before.

"Mu hu ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!" Duo cried, his maniacal laughter echoing throughout the small apartment. A few moments later, they were all walking out of the house through the falling snow, walking towards the house of the first unexpecting victim on this cold, white Christmas Eve.

Heero watched as Duo silently ran up to the first quiet house's door from a safe spot behind the trees.

_How in the hell did I let myself get blackmailed into this…?_ he kept asking himself, even though his outer appearance was as stone-like as ever. He made a mental note to bind and gag Duo if he ever got too hyper again as the hyperactive pilot came dashing back to his hiding spot, giggling like the idiot he was. The poor owner of the house, an old lady who looked to be in her 70's, answered the door and looked around confusedly when she didn't see anyone. Bewildered, she shook her head and walked back inside.

"Ok, Heero! Your turn!" came Duo's giggling whisper, and Heero rolled his eyes before stealthily creeping up to the door. He quickly took note of his surroundings, and then rang the doorbell. He immediately heard a couple of footsteps and heard the door open, and, knowing that this was not good, quickly jumped up and grabbed hold of the gutter, swinging himself up onto the roof as he did so. A second later, the door opened, revealing the very flustered-looking old lady and Heero almost felt pity as she warily looked around. A few seconds later, the old lady went back inside, and Heero silently crept over to where he was sure he wouldn't be seen and jumped down off of the roof of the one-story building. He jogged back to his friends, only to find Duo rolling with laughter and Relena chuckling quietly under her scarf with Quatre and Trowa doing the same.

"Hn." was all Heero said, and it basically meant 'I don't see what's so funny.'

"O… Okay…" said Duo, once he had gotten control of his laughter. "I-It's my turn again… BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" He burst into laughter again, and a few minutes later, he was going up to the door once again. He reached the door, but just as he was about to press the doorbell, the door flew open and there stood a livid old lady clutching a broom in her hands.

"Think it's funny, playing Ding-Dong Ditch with an old lady, do you?!" she cried. "Well, think again, buddy, 'cause there's gonna be murder tonight!!!" Duo paled visibly as she said this, and when she raised her broom, he ran away as fast as his legs could carry him, the lady following closely. For someone as old as she, she could sure run pretty damn fast, and Duo ran all over the area before the lady finally stopped chasing him and went back into her house, satisfied. Duo came back to his friends, nursing his bruised head, and said:

"Okay, that's the last time I play Ding-Dong Ditch. Let's go back to the apartment for some egg-nog and hot cocoa." And with that they all went back to Duo's apartment, laughing their heads off. Even Heero was in stitches from Duo's predicament. Upon hearing the unfamiliar peals of laughter echoing from their normally stoic friend, the rest of them turned to Heero, looking horrified and amazed.

"What?" he managed to gasp out. Relena and the other four pilots grimly turned to each other.

"It's the first sign of the Apocalypse. Heero has started laughing aloud." Wufei said. Everyone stared at each other for a moment before looking to Heero.

"Nah." they all said at the same time, and they all cracked up, heading back to their car at the base of the mountain.

In the home of the lady they were playing Ding-Dong Ditch with, Son Goku looked over at his wife, Chi-Chi, who was putting her broom away, chuckling good-naturedly even as she smugly brushed her hands off.

"Chi-Chi, did you…?" he began as Chi-Chi took off the grey wig and mask she had been wearing.

"Yes, Goku?" asked the now young-looking Chi-Chi as their 8-year-old son Gohan came down to see what all of the racket was about.

"Um… Did you really whack Duo with your broom?" Goku ventured. Chi-Chi smirked innocently.

"Don't worry. I didn't injure him too badly." she said reassuringly. Gohan chuckled a little, relieved.

"At least you didn't throw him out of a window!" he exclaimed, causing the entire family to laugh. Suddenly, Chi-Chi turned on Gohan, her eyes blazing.

"GOHAN!!" she shouted, and the boy in question flinched, turning to his mother.

"Y-Yes, mom?" he asked timidly. Chi-Chi pointed a finger up the stairs. Gohan looked crestfallen as he started walking up the stairs to his room.

"Clear up your textbooks and get back down here immediately." Chi-Chi said to her son's retreating back. "Then get on your snow equipment. We're going outside!!"

Gohan whirled around to look at his mother as Goku openly stared at her. Then the boys looked at each other and cheered, and then Gohan rushed up the stairs. A second later, he was back down in the living room, and the small family started to pull on their snow equipment, readying for a good, fun Christmas Eve.


	2. Evilness with Binoculars!

Hey again! No, I have not dropped off the face of the earth or died in any other way. I'm sorry it took so long to update. I was pretty darn busy. Well, anywho, I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. Please let me know if anyone read it? Oh yeah, and thanks to Jedi Bubbles and TomStrife for reviewing! Mimi, you had a good point there. There were two signs of the apocalypse. And Tom, thanks for the reply. I really appreciated it!o-o I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Standard Disclaimer:

Yoda: Nothing, she owns. Own Abriel, she does. Own Zenshin, Toan, Keynu, Shino, Neo, Amina, and the Chaos Brothers, Jedi Bubbles does.

* * *

_**The Christmas Gathering**_

_Chapter 2: The Binocular Prank_

Trunks Briefs looked out the window of the Capsule Corp. into the falling snow, slightly flustered. It was Christmas Eve, and he still had yet to think of a gift to give Jaina, his wife. He thought of giving her a blaster, but she already had at least 6 of those coming to her. A lightsaber, maybe? Nah. She could easily make one herself.

_Damnit… Jaina sure is a tough person to give presents to…_ he thought as he looked out into the blizzard, trying to think of something. _Maybe a… naw, too generic._ Again he had thought of a new hydro spanner, but he knew for a fact that she had one of each kind that existed, she didn't need another one. He racked his brain for several moments, and then he decided to get up and get something to eat. Maybe that would help him think. He rose from his seat and turned towards the door, only to find Jaina herself sitting quietly on the bed reading a book entitled, **What to Expect When You're Expecting**. Trunks gave a start when he saw her there- he hadn't even noticed her come in. He had been so caught up in his thoughts that he hadn't even heard her walk in or plop down on the bed. Shaking his head, he smiled at his wife and sat down next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as he did so. She glanced over at him, one hand lying on her large belly as the other hand held up the book. Trunks knew she was quite uncomfortable- she was in the 9th month of her first pregnancy, and due to that, the pressure was causing her quite a bit of discomfort.

"I see you finally decided to notice that I came in." she said teasingly. He chuckled knowingly.

"Sorry." he said, wrapping his other arm around her to link his hands together, at the same time pulling her closer to him. "Watcha readin'?" She glanced at him skeptically and turned the book so that he could see it.

"**What to Expect When You're Expecting**." she replied simply, knowing that he had already seen the title as he had walked toward her. He nodded, playing along.

"So, what can you expect?" he asked, making sure that he wasn't included in the question. She shot him a strange look.

"Don't you mean 'we'?" she asked. He shook his head.

"Nope. I don't have to do a damn thing. You're the only one who has to go through the 36 hours of labor." he replied, a wry smile gracing his lips. She elbowed him in the ribs, causing him to chuckle.

"I'm only kidding, Jaina. What do _we_ have to expect?" he asked again, with the emphasis on the word, 'we'. She raised her eyebrows and then lowered them, closing and reopening her eyes tiredly as she did so.

"The usual." she said. "First comes the labor, and then the real fun starts." She looked up at him with a small, wry smile on her face. "The getting up at 2 o'clock a.m. for feeding and then the food flying to the walls about 9 months later." He rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

"Oh, joy. I can't wait." he said sarcastically. She looked at him with raised eyebrows.

"Hey. This baby is half yours, so you get to do half the work." she stated matter-of-factly.

"We'll see, Jaina. We'll see." he said in reply, smirking. They sat there reading for several moments, before there came a shout from down below, startling them.

"BOY! GET DOWN HERE NOW!" It was Vegeta. Trunks emitted a sound that was a mixture of a sigh and a growl, and looked at Jaina.

"You can come if you want." he said, getting up. She laughed and shook her head.

"Thanks, but I think I'll pass." she said, and he shrugged, heaving a sigh.

"BOY!" came Vegeta's shout again. This time Jaina growled as Trunks walked out of the room.

"I'M COMING, DAMNIT!" Trunks shouted, his fists clenched as he stalked down the stairs. Jaina listened to her husband's footsteps disappear for several moments before she scowled at her book and set it down, placing both of her hands on her large, round belly.

_I don't get why Vegeta thinks that he can just order Trunks around like that!_ she thought irritably. _He's got his own life to live, and it doesn't revolve around training and trying to get stronger all the time! _Her intense brandy-brown gaze nearly burned a hole in the wall as she attempted to think of a way to attain some semblance of revenge upon Vegeta for being such a jerk. Suddenly an evil grin spread across her face as an equally evil prank came to her mind. _Hmmm, I wonder… but, the question is, would it work…?_ As if in reply, the baby in her womb kicked. _Yes, of course it will!_ She smiled and rubbed her belly. _That's my girl!_ Still smirking madly, she heaved herself up off of the bed and made her way downstairs.

* * *

"Oh, come on, Vegeta, it won't be that bad…" Bulma pleaded forcefully, glancing back at her husband, who wore an even more intense scowl than usual on his face. "At least try to smile a little?" He huffed, causing the nearby Trunks and Jaina to snicker. The prince of all Saiyans was, of all places, with his family at- can you guess it?- the zoo. The Children's Zoo, no less. Little Trunks (Mirai's present-time counterpart, who was still just a toddler) gurgled and cooed at all of the adorable, not-so-cute-other-than-to-blow-up, in Vegeta's eyes, animals. Small ponies and mares trotted around their pasture in front of the family of five (soon to be extended), neighing and lowing to their hearts' content, much to the annoyance of the Saiyan prince. 

_Why did I even go along with this?_ he asked himself bitterly. Suddenly there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned, annoyed, to find his daughter-in-law standing there, holding out a pair of what looked to be metal tubes joined at the center to him. He arched an eyebrow skeptically at her even as his scowl deepened, and she rolled her eyes. _The nerve!_

"Vegeta, would you like to take a look around?" she asked, her voice blunt. "There are some eagles flying around up there. Maybe you could get a good look before you go back to your childish pouting. Hmph, some Saiyan prince you are." She huffed and walked back to Trunks, who grinned- such an unimportant gesture, if Vegeta had any comments- and pointed up to a wheeling shape high above them all. Despite his resolve to remain cold and uninterested, Vegeta felt his curiosity piqued. Eagles were rumored to be some of the most powerful birds around, from what he'd seen on the- what was it called? Oh yeah.- television. Finally putting aside his royal, pain-in-the-ass pride, he raised the strange, tube-like contraption to his eyes. When his opticals adjusted to the new sense of super-sight, he lifted his gaze up to the heavens. A majestic, brown bird wheeled overhead, sharp yellow eyes scanning the ground miles below for any sign of prey as its white head quested from side to side. Vegeta felt a smirk coming to his lips, in contempt of his best interests. This bird reminded him a little of himself and- dare he admit it?- his son, from both the present and the future. Quickly he wiped the smirk off of his face, and brought the sight-enhancer down away from his gaze, handing them back to his daughter-in-law with a nonchalant grunt.

"It's just a bird." he said. Her face contorted, and he rolled his eyes as Trunks stifled laughter behind one of his rough, calloused hands. Vegeta scowled at his son in confusion before stalking away to go sulk on a bench. Unknown to him, as soon as he was out of earshot, Jaina, Trunks, and Bulma all burst into silent laughter. When it had died down, Jaina spoke seriously to them, though she was still stifling her own laughter.

"Now, we can't tell him about this. Not a word, you hear me?" she said, and the other two nodded before being engulfed in their mirth once more.

* * *

The day passed swiftly, and before they knew it, the small family was walking around the mall as they searched for a place to eat. For some strange reason, Vegeta kept attracting odd stares as people passed, causing him to grow more aggravated by the second. Finally, he exploded. 

"WOULD YOU BLOODY AIRHEADS GO BACK TO YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS ALREADY?" he roared- though to some people, it was more like a shriek. The poor people in question turned back to their own self-set tasks after this eruption. Trunks frowned at his father.

"Father, did you really have to go and scare them like that?" the younger man asked coldly. Vegeta returned the lavender-haired man's frown with a glare.

"Well, if they didn't want me to blow up at them, they shouldn't have been staring!" he exclaimed furiously. Now it was Bulma's turn to turn her own trademark '**BULMA DEATH-GLARE OF DOOM**' on her husband from where she was trying to calm down a crying Little Trunks, who had been startled by Vegeta's outburst.

"VEGETA!" she shrieked. "YOU COULD HAVE AT LEAST DONE IT IN PRIVATE! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE!" Trunks and Jaina exchanged amused, yet wary, glances, and then Trunks picked up his younger self and the three of them began to walk away to go find some food, leaving Bulma and Vegeta to fight it out. As Vegeta roared something behind them, however, Jaina suddenly stiffened with a gasp, and began to fall to her knees. Trunks instinctively caught her with one arm.

"Jaina?" he asked quietly, instantly concerned even as the sick feeling of fear grew in the pit of his stomach. "Is it the baby?" She looked up at him, pain evident in her eyes, and nodded. He took a deep breath. "Stay here for a second." He rose to his feet after gently setting her down, and walked back over to Bulma and Vegeta with his younger self balanced in one arm. The Saiyan prince and his wife barely heeded the young, lavender-haired man as he approached them, but that changed when he suddenly placed Little Trunks in Bulma's arms.

"Trunks?" she asked, concerned at the frown on his face. He turned to walk back to Jaina.

"Meet me at the hospital when you two are done arguing. Don't come until then." he said to them over his shoulder, walking away. They blinked dumbly as he picked his wife up, bridal style- she winced at the movement- and flew off quickly out of an open skylight and into the open air. Bulma turned to Vegeta, and vice versa.

"Did he just say what I think he said?" she breathed in disbelief. He blinked owlishly at her, for once uncharacteristically forgetting to wear his trademark scowl.

"I think he just said what you think he said…" he stated. He was also in shock- wouldn't you be, too, if you were going to be a grandparent in just a few mere hours? Bulma's expression turned to one of outrage.

"**_THEN WHAT THE_** **_HELL ARE WE STANDING AROUND HERE FOR?_**" she shouted. "**_GET ME TO THAT HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW!_**" Vegeta gulped and picked up his wife. Yes, when it came to Bulma, he knew when to keep his mouth shut and do as he was told. As he flew away through the open skylight, a few people around him were murmuring. The words 'whipped', 'strange', and 'scary' could be heard among the most common of them.

* * *

Trunks paced back towards his father for the hundredth time that evening as he again ran his fingers through his floppy lavender hair. 

"Dammit!" he exclaimed suddenly, halting his trek and turning his gaze upwards. "What's going on in there? It sounds like she's dying, for kami's sake!" Vegeta chuckled lowly.

"She's going through childbirth, boy." he said derisively. "She's a weakling. She's going to scream like she's dying." With this last comment, Bulma was off on him again.

"VEGETA, SCREAMING DURING CHILDBIRTH IS **NOT** A SIGN OF WEAKNESS!" she shrieked, enraged, as her blazing gaze swiveled to rest on her husband. "IN FACT, IT SHOULD BE CONSIDERED A SIGN OF STRENGTH, THAT SHE WOULD HAVE ENOUGH CONFIDENCE IN HERSELF TO PUT ASIDE HER PRIDE AND LET THE WORLD KNOW OF HER PAIN!" There was a loud slapping sound, and a crash, and if anyone dared to turn their hesitant gazes onto the prince of the Saiyans, they would have seen him lying in a disgraceful heap on the hospital floor. Even if that fact did not cause the random observer to burst out laughing or give Vegeta an odd stare, said random observer would probably have laughed or given said odd stare for a different reason. However, Trunks shook his head to again take up his pacing, ignoring his father as Jaina's pained cries died down. Worry came over him again when silence reigned again, but then the sound of a baby's first wails wafted through the door, and his knees nearly buckled, had he not forced them to stay straight. He was a father. His knees really did give out a second later, however, when another cry joined the first, and he crashed to the floor in shock as Bulma rushed over to throw her arms around her only son.

"Trunks, you're a dad!" she exclaimed in his ear. A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.

"I guess I am, aren't I?" he asked, just before the room's door opened and a nurse stepped out. She bowed to Trunks and Bulma, and then gestured to the room.

"You may go and see her now, but please remember that she is very tired, and in a delicate condition." she said, and then added, "Just the father, please." Bulma beamed at her son and nodded to him before literally pushing him into the room when his legs couldn't seem to work. Once he disappeared through the door, the nurse raised an eyebrow at the recovering Vegeta.

"Ma'am, does your husband need medical treatment, too?" she asked. Vegeta, overhearing this, exclaimed,

"Dammit, I'm fine!" The nurse looked offended, but shook it off before giving him an odd stare. Vegeta saw this, the straw that broke the camel's back.

"**WHY THE HELL DOES EVERYONE KEEP STARING AT ME ODDLY?**" he roared. The nurse was undaunted as she gestured to his face and then motioned to a bathroom down the hall.

"Sir, I would recommend that you go wash up before you see your grandchildren, or you may frighten them." she said, and then walked down the hall in the other direction. Vegeta looked about to protest, but was silenced by a glare from Bulma.

"Vegeta, just do it!" she exclaimed, and then her glare turned into a seductive scowl. "Unless you'd like me to come with you…" He blanched at her insinuation, and scrambled off down the hall to the men's room. As he walked in and over to the sink, he wondered why he would have to wash his face. That is, until he looked up from his wet hands and into the mirror. He had black ink circles around his eyes and a black ink line across the bridge of his nose, exactly where the binoculars had been earlier at the zoo. After a split second of silent fuming and bewilderment, his temper snapped.

"**_TRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNKS!_**" he roared. Down the hall and in the delivery room, Trunks and Jaina smirked triumphantly at each other over their infant twin son and daughter, Gokou and Naoko, before giving each other a thumbs up.

"Mission accomplished."

* * *

Yay for chapter 2! For a while there, I thought I'd never get it up! o-o Just to clear some things up for anyone who was confused: 

Jaina: Trunks' wife, from the Star Wars universe. She is the daughter of Han Solo and Princess Leia Organa Solo. She is actually a leading character in the Young Jedi Knights and New Jedi Order books. o-o

Gokou and Naoko Briefs: Twin son and daughter of Trunks and Jaina. Gokou is the boy, Naoko is the girl, Gokou is named after Son Goku, one of Trunks' friends, and Naoko… well, I just liked the name. o-o'

The Prank: Something that my cousin came up with. Basically, you put ink on the pad-thingies around the eyepieces of binoculars, and when the victim puts them up to their eyes, they get black ink around their eyes in the shape of glasses. If you're really evil, you could tie some sort of string between the eyepieces and put ink on that, too. Then when the person puts the binoculars up to their eyes, they'll get a streak across their nose so that it really does look like they're wearing glasses! #stifles snicker#

If you couldn't tell, this chapter mostly took place in the Dragonball Z universe. I apologize to any Jaina/Zekk-ers, Jaina/Kyp-ers, or Jaina/Jag-ers out there for the Jaina/Trunks pairing. I actually got this pairing from an old story of mine (my first fanfiction, which I did for a Language Arts project in 6th grade for Mrs. Oliver). It was completely random back then, but J/T is my favorite DBZ/SW crossover pairing. Haven't been able to get past it. o-o Hope that that cleared some things up for y'all. Well, until the next time, sayonara!

Fanatic

P.S. Damn FF.N! It won't let me put in any of the symbols and stuff that I want!


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